The Knee Bone's Connected To ...
tsb

Such a face! Daddy Bones@ age 12, gracing the book's cover.

 

 How to Keep Your Sanity Intact When a Loved One Needs a Nursing Home  

It’s estimated that more than 50 million people provide care for a chronically ill, disabled or aged family member or friend during any given year.

Studies show that extremely stressed caregivers can age or die prematurely. 

“Bette Davis said ‘old age is no place for sissies,’ but caring for an older loved one isn’t for the feint of heart, either,” says Bones. “I loved my dad and we were very close, but the strain of ‘putting’ him in a nursing home was so overwhelming for all of us that I felt like I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown.”

Becoming aware of some of the don’ts” of long-term care can make daily life easier for nursing home residents and for their family caretakers,” she notes.

Bones offers some key examples from her Nursing Home Checklist:

· Ask clergy, family, and friends - especially those in the health care field - to recommend outstanding nursing homes.

· When touring a nursing home, ask other visitors for frank feedback about the facility. Don’t just inspect the “sample” room, look into residents’ rooms to check for cleanliness.

· Assure your loved one that you will be their ongoing advocate.

· Visit your loved one often and at varying times of the day - and night. This alerts all of the caregivers that you are keeping an eye on your loved one.

· Get to know the staff, especially your loved one’s immediate caregivers.

· Thank the employees for the thankless job that they do.

· Put your loved one’s name on all their belongings, including clothes and personal products. Never leave money or valuables in their room.

· Place a quilt, photos and other small touches to create a “homey” room.

· Put a brief bio and picture of your loved one at the entrance of their room to “introduce” them to staff and visitors.

. Bring old photos when you visit your loved one - it will give you something to look at if conversation lags.

. Bring different edible treats to spice-up the resident's menu.

 

 


 

 

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Monday
May182009

Free Books and the Devil Whiskey

Saw an excellent play last week, "The Seafarers." In it, several Irishmen who have been downing glass after glass of whiskey, beer and "poteen" (strong Irish moonshine) on a Christmas Eve refer to some vagrants who are carrying on in an alley as "dem winos." You have to love it, don't you, the Irish pot calling the Irish kettle black? Anyway, on the drive home through downtown, trying to contemplate the message of the play, I noticed a bunch of young people rummaging through boxes of books that were being thrown out for trash day. I slowed down my car, lusting after the goods as only a true trash-picker can. "Anything good?" I asked one young woman who was holding onto an old, hardcover book. "Just some funny stuff," she replied, showing me the title, "1,000 Things to Do Before You Get Married." Ha, I advised her, it's more like a million things - no rush! We both had a good laugh at that one - the young twenty-something, out  for the night with her friends, and me, the old married broad who was single until she was 46. But I didn't tell the youngster that long tale, nor did I compete with her and her pals for literary treasures on the curbside. I just waved goodbye, drove off and left them to their foraging and the pursuit of fun things to do before they - maybe - get married some day. Then I returned to ruminating about the play in which the Devil visits two of the Irishmen to collect their souls in a deal they made with him years ago. Could the Devil symbolize alcohol, which we learn during the course of the play, is the root of all the considerable misery in these characters' lives? Hmmmmm. I'll have to think about that one - preferably, over a nice cuppa tea.

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