The Knee Bone's Connected To ...

Such a face! Daddy Bones@ age 12, gracing the book's cover.


 How to Keep Your Sanity Intact When a Loved One Needs a Nursing Home  

It’s estimated that more than 50 million people provide care for a chronically ill, disabled or aged family member or friend during any given year.

Studies show that extremely stressed caregivers can age or die prematurely. 

“Bette Davis said ‘old age is no place for sissies,’ but caring for an older loved one isn’t for the feint of heart, either,” says Bones. “I loved my dad and we were very close, but the strain of ‘putting’ him in a nursing home was so overwhelming for all of us that I felt like I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown.”

Becoming aware of some of the don’ts” of long-term care can make daily life easier for nursing home residents and for their family caretakers,” she notes.

Bones offers some key examples from her Nursing Home Checklist:

· Ask clergy, family, and friends - especially those in the health care field - to recommend outstanding nursing homes.

· When touring a nursing home, ask other visitors for frank feedback about the facility. Don’t just inspect the “sample” room, look into residents’ rooms to check for cleanliness.

· Assure your loved one that you will be their ongoing advocate.

· Visit your loved one often and at varying times of the day - and night. This alerts all of the caregivers that you are keeping an eye on your loved one.

· Get to know the staff, especially your loved one’s immediate caregivers.

· Thank the employees for the thankless job that they do.

· Put your loved one’s name on all their belongings, including clothes and personal products. Never leave money or valuables in their room.

· Place a quilt, photos and other small touches to create a “homey” room.

· Put a brief bio and picture of your loved one at the entrance of their room to “introduce” them to staff and visitors.

. Bring old photos when you visit your loved one - it will give you something to look at if conversation lags.

. Bring different edible treats to spice-up the resident's menu.





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Tea, Sticky Buns and the Body of Christ

Postscripts From a Nursing Home

Have you ever taken care of someone you loved - and also wanted to strangle? Join the club.

Caregiving is not for the weak. A strong constitution and a large set of you-know-whats comes in handy when you are trying to make soup, organize 12 medications, and figure out how to nicely tell a nurse to go !*!%@! herself...

Tea, Sticky Buns and the Body of Christ; Postscripts From a Nursing Home is the story of one family, their beloved but stubborn father, and his last months in a nursing home. A "home" wasn't exactly what any of them had planned...not that they ever had a plan. See how they coped - sort of - with all of the angst, incontinence and ongoing irony. Along the way, read about a nun with a bird on her shoulder, fights that erupted during bingo, and daughters who laughed, cried and crumbled as they became the raw meat of the "sandwich generation."

Look for the book at Amazon

Read all about it and, in the post below, let me know if you can relate.

And God Bless Us, everyone.



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March 9, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersubalashi

Hi Diane,
This is your cousin Mary. I finally read the book and laughed and cried! Boy, can I relate to all of the information.

Are you ready to write part 2! I have funny info about Dad and Uncle Tom's lunches.

Great men who will be forever missed!

Great Job!


September 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMary conallen rowley


Loved the book !!! I bought two and sent one to my Mother. Mom has since passed the book on to my brothers who also appreciate the "Tom Bones Humor". Mom says "Make sure you give it back"
Everyone who has read it says the memories of your Dad are spot on and couldn't put the book down.
For all Baby Boomers, this is a must read.

Paul Segar

December 7, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPaul Segar

Wonderful many things in it reminded me of the last years we spent with Mom in assisted living and then skilled nursing....I laughed and cried....couldn't put it down...thanks for sharing your memories with us!

July 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachel Marshall

Great Book !! A must read for all of the baby boomers who have taken care of parents and/or grandparents during an illness or end of life. Diane caught all the emotions from every angle- the parents feelings, siblings feelings and her feelings. It was nice to know that other families deal with the same issues when a loved one is put in a nursing home. You will laugh and cry but in the end you will be sorry the book ended. Pick the book up and don't expect to be able to put it down. Finished in one day. Have recommended to all my friends. Thanks and awaiting your next book.

July 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoanne Losse

LOVED the book ! Received it as a gift and found that I couldn't put it down, once I started to read it. Brought back many memories of my family during a very emotional time. Can't wait for your next book.

May 16, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkathleen pacitti

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