I'LL GIVE YA SOMETHING TO SMILE ABOUT...

Last week, a few photos in the daily newspaper really irked me.

One was of Jerry Sandusky, who has since been convicted of child molestation.

The other was of Father James J. Brennan, who was - wow, what a coinkydink - also accused of child molestation (attempted rape of a 14-year-old boy), but the jury deadlocked on his charge.

The photos of both men, published the day before the juries decided their fates, showed them smiling as if they were on their way to the ice cream store.

A photo of Sandusky with a half-witted/creepy/unnerving grin is nothing new. To me, he always seems to be desperately trying to emit an aura of a regular, khaki-wearing fella who is just chillin' and maybe heading over to gym to watch some game tapes.Whenever I spotted a photo of his Separated-From-Goofy-at-Birth mug as he casually strolled to the courtroom, I wanted to shake his big square head and say, "For God's sake, pervert, the jig is finally up and they're shining a spotlight on your evil soul, so wipe that smile off your face NOW before I smack it off."

But just above Sandusky's picture in the paper that very same day was a photograph of Father Brennan enjoying a hearty, knee-slapper of a guffaw with one of his lawyers as they ambled over to their courthouse.

Let's face it, this clergyman hardly has good judgement, but must he be reminded of why he is at the criminal justice center ...and it ain't exactly unpaid parking tickets? Perhaps this is neither the time nor the place to enjoy a classic "A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar..." joke with his pal. And, maybe I'm just an old fuddy duddy, but I believe that if you happen to notice a throng of photographers huddling nearby as you head to your child rape charge, maybe it's best if you didn't publicly bust a gut cackling like you're at Friday Happy Hour.

Those two photos steamed me and then, of course just to really taunt me, the next day, the newspaper carried a grinning close-up of the maniac in Norway who shot 77 people as he sat through his trial. If you didn't know who is was, you'd think the effervescent smile was that of a young man who had just been named next season's Bachelor. Revolting.

But things aren't all bad.

The next day the same paper ran a photo of Phillies manager Charlie Manuel and umpire Bob Davidson, and neither one of them was smiling.

In fact, they looked like two aging boars on the prairie, about to tear into each other to keep from starving to death.

Those guys have horse sense and know when to keep their game face on.

Maybe the morons who are on trial could learn a lesson or two from these good old boys: NEVER smile, especially when the cameras are flashing, the whole world is watching and you're guilty as all hell.